So the fact that we’re currently in a pandemic, I feel that this is the best time to discuss the truth about moving away from your hometown. In theory, the thought of starting a new life sounds amazing, but the truth is that it comes with some consequences.
I, personally, knew from the time I was 16 years old that I wanted to move out of my parent’s house once I turned 18. Hell, I knew I wanted to move out of New York State. And guess what, I did! I ended up attending Fairleigh Dickinson University in New Jersey and stayed in a dorm my first semester. Although having a roommate was the worst, I had finally felt a sense of freedom and independence that I didn’t have living at home. Due to personal reasons, I was unable to stay in Jersey and had to move back to NY. However, that never deterred my dream of moving.
Two years later, ‘20 going on ‘21, I moved to Houston, TX which was the absolute best decision I’ve ever made in my life. This is the first place I’ve lived that made me feel at peace and want to settle down and have a family. I get asked all the time: What made you move? What did your parents say when you decided to move so far away? So here’s the answer. Initially, I was so miserable and drained in NY, that one day I googled “best public relation programs in the US.” Immediately the top two schools that popped up was UCLA and UH (University of Houston). I applied to both and actually got accepted to both within two weeks of applying. Houston ended up being cheaper and I sent in my deposit and scheduled my orientation. To be completely honest, my parents didn’t know I was moving until two weeks before my orientation. They didn’t even have any idea that I was planning on moving. But, I had one life to live and I’m the type of person that doesn’t allow others to tell me what I can and cannot do.
Now that was just the backstory, let’s get to the reality of what it truly means to move. It takes a lot of mental strength to pick up your entire life and move away from everything you’ve ever known. You’re in a place where you know absolutely no one. You’re starting a brand new life with no friends or family by your side. This will make homesickness inevitable, at least for the first couple of months. You want to just pack your bags and go back home, but trust me once you start making friends and becoming comfortable, that thought goes completely out the window.
Moving out on your own forces you to be independent at a faster pace. You now have your own apartment that you need to furnish and utility bills that need to be paid. If you have a vehicle, add the car note, insurance and maintenance on top of that as well. This is not for the faint of heart. You have to be a hustler and secure a bag by all means necessary. My best advice to those thinking about moving, please save and budget beforehand. Set yourself up for success especially if you don’t know how to hustle. Being from NY, it’s in my blood. I’ve been hustling ever since I can remember, so moving to another state without having saved as much as I should have wasn’t an issue for me because I knew that I could make it work.
Though finances can be a struggle, the true reality about moving away is that life moves on without you. You miss out on serious milestones in your family’s lives. I remember when I went to visit my mom after a year of being in Houston, and I saw how much she aged in that time. I’ve missed birthday parties, family gatherings, holidays, baby showers, the list can go on. While you’re living your life, life is happening back home without you and you have to come to terms with that. Truthfully, that is the hardest part. This pandemic has shown us that life is short and can be taken away at any moment.
For any of my readers who are planning a big move, it will be the best decision you ever make in your life. You will learn about yourself in a way that you never would have if you stayed in your comfort zone. Take into consideration that moving comes with a price, but if you have the will power to push through, you will have no regrets. It’s your life, so choose how you want to live it.